What Desmond Howard Can Teach Us About Relationships (and Life)

There I was at a swanky, invite-only speaker training at the Time Inc. offices on 6th Avenue.

Retired Super Bowl winning athlete and ESPN broadcaster Desmond Howard’s turn came to give his talk.

“Control the controllables…”, he began.

He went on:

“In nineteen eighty-(*mock coughs*) I was a freshman at the University of Michigan… A gentleman by the name of Greg Harden spoke to us. One of the slogans he gave us was “Control the controllables.”

He says that at the time the lesson went over his head.

“A year later I’m on the football field… One of our players returns a punt, goes down, routine tackle.”

His star teammate had blown out his knee.

Howard visited him at the hospital.

He says, “At that moment, something clicked…”

“You can control going to class. You can control doing your homework, going to study hall, turning in your papers on time. But you can’t control everything that goes down on that football field. No matter how great you think you are.”

After that Howard’s career took off. He won the NCAA’s highest honor, the Heisman Trophy, became a first-round NFL draft-pick and later a Super Bowl winner and Most Valuable Player.

Even Desmond Howard was once a wide-eyed freshman.

Yet inside him was the possibility of the champion he became.

When you’re gifted with talent and charisma, it’s easy to over-rely on luck.

When so much of your success depends on you, could it hurt to ask yourself: are you controlling the controllables?

Note: Registration is now open for my Blueprint for Love coaching program. This program is for women who are ready to take control and create a long-term, committed relationship this year. Good men ARE out there. I’ll teach you how to attract yours and keep him. Register by August 19th. Click here to learn more.


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Tara Book CoverHi, I’m Tara
Padua, founder of NextFem. I help high-powered women master their relationships.

As a professional executive coach since 2003, I’ve accrued more than 7,000 client-coaching hours working with 400+ female leaders at organizations like Condé Nast, Cartier, Deutsche Bank, Diesel, Louis Vuitton, Siemens and many, many more.

Healthy relationships are the foundation of a life that works, and my life experiences have fueled my mission to help women get the love they deserve.

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