What are the psychological effects of being diagnosed with a medical condition? What if the condition is incurable and has likely caused weight gain, the growth of facial and body hair, mood swings, anxiety, depression, and infertility? You would want help from a mental health professional if you received this diagnosis of PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome), because its symptoms and treatment will affect every aspect of your life and the ability to enjoy it. Join us to learn more about PCOS, its symptoms and treatments, and how you can find the light of hope at the end of this dark tunnel.
Dr. Gretchen Kubacky is “The PCOS Psychologist” who is based in Los Angeles, CA. She is a certified PCOS educator, the founder of PCOS Wellness, and a PCOS patient herself. Her newly published book is The PCOS Mood Cure: Your Guide to Ending the Emotional Roller Coaster. With her characteristic warmth and practical approach grounded in research, Dr. Gretchen shares in this episode about coping mechanisms for the mental health issues related to PCOS and how to take charge of your physical well-being and happiness to create a sustainable path to freedom.
Becoming “The PCOS Psychologist”
Dr. Gretchen built a 20-year career in commercial real estate before having medical problems in her early 30’s. Burnout led her back to school to re-tool as a psychologist and her own medical issues drew her to the psychological aspects of medical issues. She worked with cancer patients and others before finding her niche in the world of infertility, learning that PCOS is the underlying cause of 75% of female infertility. She focuses her practice today in working with women about all types of endocrine and gynecological issues.
How endocrine problems affect your mood
Any endocrine (hormonal) disorder or imbalance affects the entire body, most especially the brain, where mood glitches can occur. There is also a connection between PCOS and insulin resistance, which adversely affects other body organs and systems. For example, a simple imbalance of testosterone, which women need in small amounts, can cause aggressiveness, irritability, and depression. This testosterone imbalance is a key factor in PCOS symptoms. Since the endocrine system manages all hormonal functions, PCOS sufferers face a host of disorders. Most recently, the connection between gut health and brain health has come to the forefront of PCOS research.
Dr. Gretchen’s personal experience with PCOS
Diagnosed with PCOS in her early 20’s, Dr. Gretchen was treated with birth control pills and a list of side effects and told to come back if she wanted to get pregnant. She dealt with weight problems and mood disorders before being diagnosed with hypothyroidism and Type 2 diabetes in her 30’s. Her life was filled with gynecological irregularities and frequent Pap smears into her late 30’s, when she realized she wanted to have a baby. All of these experiences helped her recognize the ridiculous path that women had to go through and how they needed help and support, which prompted her to begin researching and changing the way she treated her patients.
What is PCOS and how is it diagnosed?
PCOS is the primary endocrine disorder affecting women. It lasts for a lifetime and is incurable and often misdiagnosed because of its wide variety of symptoms. The Rotterdam Criteria list three factors to qualify for diagnosis: irregular or absent periods, signs of excessive androgens (acne and unusual hair growth or loss), and polycystic ovaries (found by ultrasound). If a woman has two of the three criteria, then she is officially diagnosed with PCOS. There is no actual medical definition of the disease, women of all weights and body types can have it, and we don’t know what causes it.
What to do if you think you have PCOS
The first step is to see your gynecologist, general practitioner, or endocrinologist and describe your symptoms. You can find symptom lists online to see how yours match up. Dr. Gretchen helps on the psychological side by helping patients deal with a new diagnosis that can never be cured and will never go away. This is stressful and scary knowledge, especially if you are still young and want to have children someday. PCOS causes infertility by interrupting the ovulation cycle. Dr. Gretchen’s work focuses on the message of hope in accepting, managing, and containing the disease and dealing with the grief over the loss of femininity and the possible loss of fertility.
The loss of femininity
With PCOS, you have a base hormonal imbalance with too many male hormones, which gives excess facial and body hair. Excess fat settles in the abdomen, giving the “middle-aged male body.” When you add in acne and hair loss on the head, this brings shame and the loss of femininity. Birth control pills and Metformin (an oral diabetes medication to lower blood sugar) are the most commonly prescribed medications. Shockingly, 40% of PCOS patients will have diabetes by age 40.
Dr. Gretchen’s treatment approach
Dr. Gretchen starts with a comprehensive life and medical history to find out what has or hasn’t been helping with sleep, anxiety, and depression. She constructs a plan with a supportive base for good health, beginning with good sleep. A good starting point is to have patients aim for 30 minutes of extra sleep each night. The rest of her treatment plan is designed to help patients set personal goals to feel better.
The impact of PCOS on relationships
Everyone around you is affected by your PCOS. They may see you as difficult, moody, and non-participatory, and they may not understand why. Dating is difficult because the extra testosterone messes up the sex drive either to make it slump or be non-existent or to kick it into overdrive. The extra weight gain and unwanted hair effects intimacy because of the shame and self-consciousness. Education is key for the patient and for loved ones, so they can understand why someone with PCOS may seem cranky all the time.
Dr. Gretchen’s healing approach
While there is no cure for PCOS, you can opt for control. For Dr. Gretchen, recent lab tests showed almost normal results with no evidence of PCOS-related issues. The key is control and management, which Gretchen does with daily meditation, gentle exercise, and a good support system. Author and nutritionist Lyn-Genet Recitas has been a huge resource and help. Gretchen shares how she deals with special occasion foods like birthday cake, in balance with living a while and joyous life.
You are in charge
Dr. Gretchen teaches women how to be proactive and assertive in their healthcare and treatment. You may end up with several specialists, but you have to be the one in charge. You have to keep up with lab results and monitor your eating plan to see what works and what doesn’t. Ask the doctors to speak with each other, if possible. It will improve your overall care. Empower yourself as a patient!
Dr. Gretchen’s advice
If PCOS is part of you, then it should be shared with someone you’re dating but it’s not first date material! Talk about it in a casual manner as you get to know someone better. Be gentle and be honest. For those with PCOS who want to have children someday, they should look at trying sooner rather than later, because it may take assisted reproductive technology. If you reach age 35, consider harvesting and freezing your eggs for later use. Gretchen shares her personal story of how her journey to have a child ended with a surprising twist.
Highlights of the Episode:
- 1:33 – The psychology of medical conditions
- 3:04 – The connection between mental health disorders and the endocrine system
- 5:33 – Dr. Gretchen’s personal experience with PCOS
- 7:43 – What is PCOS?
- 13:06 – How do I know if I have PCOS?
- 16:08 – The loss of femininity
- 20:37 – The course of treatment for PCOS
- 22:58 – The impact on relationships
- 25:10 – Dr. Gretchen’s experience with healing
- 28:43 – Psychological management of PCOS
- 30:55 – How to be an empowered patient
- 32:21 – Dr. Gretchen’s advice for PCOS patients
- 40:31 – The Fem Five
Resources Mentioned:
- www.pcoswellness.com Visit Dr. Gretchen’s website to learn more and find the free gift of a chapter from her book and a worksheet!
- The PCOS Mood Cure: Your Guide to Ending the Emotional Roller Coaster by Gretchen Kubacky, Psy.D.
- The Plan: Eliminate the Surprising “Healthy” Foods That Are Making You Fat and Lose Weight Fast by Lyn-Genet Recitas
- The Metabolism Plan: Discover the Foods and Exercises that Work for Your Body to Reduce Inflammation and Drop Pounds Fast by Lyn-Genet Recitas
- Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide by Kay Redfield Jamison
The Fem Five:
1. Favorite book for women?
- The PCOS Mood Cure: Your Guide to Ending the Emotional Roller Coaster – “Mine”
- Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide by Kay Redfield Jamison
2. Favorite self-care hack?
- “Batch cooking!”
3. Best piece of advice and who gave it to you?
- “From my mother – ’Learn to type well and fast’.”
4. Female thought leader of CEO you’re into right now?
- Nadia Bolz-Weber, Lutheran minister and founding pastor of House for All Saints and Sinners in Denver, CO
5. One piece of advice you’d give your five years younger self?
- “Let go and relax. Have more fun. Go to the beach.”
Last Time on The NextFem Podcast
Switching Careers to Land Your Dream Job – with Dr. Dawn Graham
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